"This is a painting I did of my former girlfriend, Tanya.", Peter said.  "Yeah, it's the bitch that dumped me for the Dali Lama.  I  hate that old fuck.  I really do hope the Chineese fukin' choke him!"

"I  haven't had a piece of ass as good since she left me, y'know?  That's the reason I'm always falling for Girl Scouts."

At this point the janitor had taken pity on Peter and had given him enough slugs to get a six-pack out of the beer  machine, so he was mellowing out.

"This is something I did after Tanya had her miscarrage.  It was about a month or two before she decided that the Dali Lama was sexier than I am.", Peter burped.

"Hey, you guys have any cheese and crackers?  I  need something in my stomach or I think I'm gonna be sick."